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With the stupidbowl quickly approaching, ad executives around the country are vehemently yelling at interns and ruining their marriages, all because they’re scared the commercial they commissioned won’t be funny. They’ve used chunky babies, spotted dogs, and even giant boobs–all in hopes of being the favorite.

Though not an ad executive, nor anything close to it, I too thought about making a funny commercial for the 2013 Superbowl. But via a quick Google search, I came to realize that after the cost of making the commercial, I would also have to pay 2.4 million dollars to buy 30 seconds worth of air time. Seeing that I’m still having trouble buying lunch, a Superbowl commercial is a little out of my budget.

Well at least one that’s made by an ad company and put on national TV.  Here’s one I could afford to make and broadcast over YouTube:


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If you’re unfamiliar with Manti Te’o's story: Notre Dame linebacker makes up story of girlfriend, then makes up story of her dying from leukemia, then gets more Twitter followers, then gets a better chance at winning the Heisman trophy, then gets exposed as a fraud.

This is the hilarious auto-tuned remix of his interview with Katie Couric.

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As an avid traveler I have been in many of the world’s airport. I’ve eaten in them, slept in them, and on one occasion, used a bathroom sink as a personal shower (I’m no longer allowed in the JetBlue terminal of Atlanta’s International Airport). Most airports are used as places to transport you to somewhere else; a quick entry and exit from/for extended transit (unless you’re Tom Hanks in The Terminal). Asides from myself and a couple other travel junkies, no one really enjoys being in airports. You associate them with the place you’re overcharged for bags, groped by pushy security agents, and stuck without wifi when your flight is canceled before Christmas. Airports fly low on the list of places travelers want to be (lower on the list is in the trunk of an Al Qaeda terrorist bus or hiking behind a pack of gassy donkeys). But thanks to the ingenuity and consideration of Korean engineers and designers, things just changed.

If you’ve never been to Incheon International Airport in Seoul, South Korea it’s worth the trip. Not even to see the country, but solely for the opportunity to stay in the airport. Like their underground transit system (second best in the world), they built Incheon with the traveler in mind. As far as structure, it’s big and handsome like most new-age airports, but where this stands alone is in its accommodations. Accommodations? You mean like McDonald’s and a Sharper Image that charges six-hundred dollars for a pair of socks? No, silly. This place has a golf course, a museum, and a SKATING RINK! Let that sliver of airport luxury settle into your image of pre/post-airplane paradise. Legitmately, I would book a flight with a layover just to hangout at this place. It’s like a Discovery Zone for communing adults (foreigners: Discovery Zone was a place where little children could climb toy towers and jump into ball pits as deep at the Atlantic Ocean. Since the company closed, the percentage of people who believe in God has fallen). For seven years in a row it was rated the best airport in the world by Airports Council International (I don’t know who Airports Council International is, but they sound official). And as per Wikipedia: “It takes only 16 minutes for departure and 12 minutes for arrival process, which is far above the global standards of 60 and 45 minutes respectively.” Truly, this is a magical place. It is Disney World of airports, and they have a skating rink… people, a skating rink.

Whiling traveling from Shanghai to Kathmandu I had a ten hour layover in Incheon–the best layover of my life. By far the biggest perk was the sleeping accommodations. Yes, I know JFK and LAX have hotels right next to the airport that makes it “accommodating,” but you have to pay for those. I travel on a budget, and therefore dishing out a hundred something dollars for a room so I can sleep while waiting for my next flight is not something I’m going to do (think of how many dinners that would buy in Haiti). This place had a whole floor devoted to the enrichment of your layover. You take the escalator up toward heaven and what you find is a palace in which the world’s royalty lie around watching movies, using the internet, and getting massages on free massage chairs. The only things we get free in America is trans fat and videos of cats hugging dogs–I didn’t know how to act. I ran around using computers (specifically, setting my blog to each computer’s homepage), getting foot massages, and renting books from the 24-library. I thought: Finally a country recognizes my royal bloodline. This was the greatest layover of my life. Here’s an except from my travel journal:

It’s 2:30am and I’m at the airport in Seoul, South Korea. This might be the greatest airport I’ve ever been to. There’s a huge lounge with showers, beds and free back massage chairs. I’ve been getting a back massage for the past half hour in front of a Internet cafe covered in Chanukah lights. Is it possible to marry an airport?

As I flipped through my library book and browsed the showtimes for the movie theater, I strongly considered skipping my flight and living here for several months. If I had to reenact the life Tom Hanks’ character in The Terminal this is where I’d want to do it (I don’t know why I would ever have to reenact this character’s life). It would be like living in a giant hostel, but with less bed bugs and warmer showers (yes, there are warm showers in the airport–if only Atlanta’s airport added them as well).

Incheon had so many amenities that after landing I spent five hours wandering into different rooms and stores. I was exploring the inter-workings of an Asian airport in the middle of the night. But unfortunately, by the time my Louis and Clarke expedition was over, everyone else in the airport had found the travelers oasis and took up all the beds. Given, there were still plenty activities to keep me busy, but the time change and jet lag began to take effect. It was 4:15am and I walked around the floor considering my options for sleep: laying flat across the row of massage chairs, a booth at one of the sushi restaurants, and, and, then I saw this:

Incheon International Airport Photos, Discovery Zone in Asia, Best Airports review for Budget Travelers, Quickest Airports in the World

It was South Korea’s version of Discovery Zone–with added disco/holiday lights. I walked in, turned the lights off, and made my bed in a sea of plastic balls and gymnastic mattes. Not only did this airport offer golf, but it afforded me an opportunity to reignite the flame of childhood. I felt like a child–a balding, slightly bearded, jet-lagged child.

Note: At 6:15am I was awakened by a security office calling out: “Sir, why are you sleeping inside the play pen? There are beds everywhere.” I ignored him and played on the rope swing–my flight wasn’t for another two hours.

I’ve considered believing in God ever since that night,

Daniel Dickey

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Best YouTube Downloader That Works, How to download videos from YouTube, Download YouTube Video TutorialI just wasted the last two hours of my life trying to find a YouTube downloader that actually worked. It took that long because 99% of the websites online are scams. Legitimacy, the first thirty minutes were spent downloading programs that filled my computer with coupons for .99 cent pancakes and buy-one-get-one-free escorts. The next hour was spent browsing video tutorials that were either outdated or also pointed me back to the websites with the pancakes and prostitutes. I gave up on trying to download videos and made a turkey sandwich (this was great idea, as the sandwich was delicious).

After eating and napping, I found YTD Video Downloader. I downloaded it from CNET, but feel free to get it from wherever. As for the program, it works perfectly and reliably. The only downside (which isn’t that big of deal) it loads itself on your Firefox/Internet Explorer search bar and favorites menu. Just go to options and remove it.

If you appreciate the time I saved you, please click on the link below to like my blog. Thanks!

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After a busy six months of elections, grad school applications, and world travel I’ve decided to sand down the internet rust that has begun to form itself all over my blog. In the past I remember signing onto this site and thinking: well damn, this is one fine-looking piece of intern blabber. But as of recently I’d sign on and think: ugh, this design blows. That header looks like a fat penguin threw up on it. I then close my computer and eat doughnuts until I fall asleep on the couch. 

Things are changing (specifically, since the last paragraph). People all over the world are going to save this blog as their homepage just because of the fresh, functional design and layout (this is a complete and utter lie. Not to mention I don’t know how to make a blog fresh–it’s not a vegetable). But it would be nice if your eyes start to dance a little when they see all the Photoshop made fireworks I’m going to release on the homepage (again, this too is a lie. I have no power whatsoever to create fireworks on Photoshop or in real life. It’s more of a metaphor for: I’m adding additional colors).

When is this actually going to get done? First I have to add a e-commerce shopping cart for my travel photography. I’ve been telling myself I would do this for the last two years, so going by that time frame, the design changes should be finish by mid-late 2017. Which is fine, I’ve already projected 2017 to be a great year for my blog. Note I only say this because 2008-2012 and the first couple weeks of 2013, have all been terrible for my blog. Not in regard to hits and readership, that’s going awesome–but more so that the blog only makes me like six cents a months. Therefore, I’m hoping a rainbow color splash and photo shopping cart will make me as rich as Zooey Deschanel, or at least as rich as that Backstreet Boy that continues to wear ski-goggles into his late thirties (dude lives in Orlando. It’s eight-five degrees in the winter).

Getting rich off of my blog or buying goggles,

Daniel Dickey

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