Yo trick, party at my house. If you read my blog you’re invited.
Party To Celebrate Exiting My Mother’s Vagina 24 Years Ago
So I usually don’t throw birthday parties, because getting older reminds me that I’m balding, extremely unsuccessful and haven’t done anything I planned to do with my life…. BUT I did just get an awesome new apartment and really don’t feel comfortable living in it until I get belligerently drunk with my friends (all four of you) and family (Tara is my… brother).
The apartment is one block away from the L train. For those of you that STILL haven’t been to Brooklyn… you will not get shot*.
Don’t bring people who pee on the floor and/or people who tend to steal laptops. If thinking about stealing my laptop I will crush you.
There will be beer (if you consider PBR beer) and food (Doritos), but like most parties all the good beer and food is gone before anyone cool gets there, so you should probably come with your own drank/bitches & hoes.
Holler.
*Well, probably won’t get shot.
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Totally pissed I missed this